Tuesday, December 22, 2009
It's Just Not Perfect Enough!!
I do this to myself every year. I need to create the perfect Christmas for my family. I feel this need to decorate every corner of my home, I need to bake the best cookies and wrap my presents in colorful paper and bows. My tree must outshine the tree of the previous year. And I just discovered yesterday via a radio host what I'm suffering from: HPS. Sounds deadly doesn't it? It's not. It's treatable. If we want to treat it. The choice is mine to make. What is "HPS"? Most women suffer from this from Thanksgiving to Christmas and then it just goes away. It's known as "Holiday Perfection Syndrome". Do you have it? I know I do!
And yet, the other night when I was wrapping presents in front of the Christmas tree and watching The Nativity Story, I realized what Christmas was all about. It's not about the the size of the tree, or the number of presents under the tree. It's not about creating the perfectly decorated room (or rooms). It's about love, about giving, about sharing and....it's about reflecting on our blessings and the Reason For The Season.
I've made the choice that in these last few remaining days, I'm not going to worry about creating a perfect holiday. I just want to ENJOY Christmas and savor all that comes with it. Yes, I'm still a bit stressed, still have a few more gifts to buy, but I know in my heart it will get done. It will all come together just as it has all these years before.
Last weekend, we had Christmas with the grandchildren because they're not able to see each other on Christmas Day. These kids are brother and sisters, torn apart and living separately due to the bad choices their mother made. My husband and I adopted Zachery, my step-daughter's son, the same year that my oldest granddaughter was adopted by my step-daughter's mother. The youngest girl lives with her dad. For many, many years, I hardened my heart towards my step-daughter, but accepted her into my home this Christmas season to enjoy the holiday with her children. We had a wonderful time which I hadn't expected and it felt good!---That is one of the reasons to celebrate!
And in anticipation of their visit, I did everything I could to create a beautifully decorated home. Of course, it wasn't Better Homes and Garden material, but I still wanted to create a perfect Christmas environment for my guests. And everytime I turned around to place a decoration here, a decoration there, I said to myself--"It's just not perfect enough!" And guess what? It didn't matter. The day was about being together and having a good time.
So maybe next year, I'll keep it simpler. For now, I just keep telling myself--"It is perfect, just the way it is!".
Wishing all of you a very Merry Christmas!!
I'm linking up with Deck the Halls at Thoughts From Over The Rainbow